Monday, January 31, 2011

Reflections























Some things I have learned after two weeks with little Lily Fae:

  • Hormones post-pregnancy are real. For real, real. I've burst into tears more often that I'll readily admit, for both sad and happy reasons. I still don't feel quite human, but that could be the cabin fever.
  • I can barely put her down or relax, even when she's asleep. She's the most precious thing I've ever seen and I get paranoid something is going to happen to her when my back is turned.
  • The greatest smell in the world is baby smell.
  • I haven't slept longer than 2-3 hours at a time since she's arrived in this world. Although it's difficult and I'm technically exhausted, I am more fulfilled than I've ever been in my life.
  • Seriously, when she looks at me with those wide eyes (which my mother says are shaped just like Judge's) I am done for. I can't do anything but stare back. I am totally in love.
  • She stops crying when Judge sings and plays guitar to her.
  • I call her "chipmunk" because she makes sounds like a woodland creature.
  • WOW can this girl cry. I mean, girl has some lungs.
  • I never though nursing would be so amazing. The fact that I can feed my child with my body makes me feel powerful. It is seriously hard work, but I love it.
  • I feel like I live in an opium den or casino or something similar because time doesn't mean anything here. I am up at all hours of the day and night and even forget to brush my teeth. (I know, gross.)
  • Family has saved me these past few weeks. They have helped me keep my sanity through this entire process. I owe them all.
  • Nothing compares to what Judge has done for me - through the pregnancy, the endless days of expectant laughter and belly-rubbing, to the delivery room where he was my rock, giving me confidence to make it without medication and telling me he loved me, to now, as he blossoms even further into the role of father than what he was before. He holds her and my heart breaks with love. I look at her face and see his, and I am thankful for both of them.

1 comment:

Kaela said...

What beautiful thoughts. Your little girl is darling.