Art & Philosophy

Monkey see, monkey do.

Painting

Moments of Pooh

Reading Winnie the Pooh while Lillian falls asleep in my lap for her morning nap, there is no greater feeling. Light symphonic music playing, the intermittent clamor of outside goings-on, her breath getting deeper and deeper and she is eventually gone from the story - gone from me and into that special restful place where she backs up and stores all we've done for the morning.

I am thankful for my life. I have always tried to appreciate what wonderful things I've been given, but sometimes, I am swept away by the immensity of it.

And, I am thankful for Pooh. How did I never read this book when I was little? How is this my first time with the story? It is so quiet, thoughtful, egocentrically perfect for two or three-year-olds. 

She Doesn't Look Sick...

Little Lil

Dear Elizabeth Taylor,

It's been so long, so long since we've talked through letters.

My life has changed so much, and I am humbled by the work it takes to have a little (big) one such as you.

I put in the mix I made for us before you were born. It was supposed to be my "hospital mix" to greet you into the world but when it was time to greet you I was in full swing of delivery and the music was forgotten. Now it is a reminder of that time, and of the subtle hint of you, of your personality. We drove through McCalla singing and drumming drums to Chicago, (the band of course), Kris Kristofferson, some random ragtime music, and I was moved to tears. It seems it takes only that these days.

You are almost two. It is insane you walk down the steps alone. You speak clearly and communicate exactly what you want and I am in awe. You are pure rock and roll with your dancing and sentiment and I am slain by your commitment. You write music with every move you make.

You are asleep on our bed and I almost want to wake you, just to say,

Thanks.

Thanks for changing my life.

Thanks for loving the way that you do - for singing alone in the back seat, for smiling mischievously, for never really falling asleep. For loving Chicago and the Rolling Stones.

Love,

Cabbage

Lillian doing one of her favorite things - collecting leaves and rocks. This was taken a month or so ago.

The Ham in the 'Ham

Rocking Kyle's sunglasses at Rojo

Love. Her.

E.T. Updates

Sigh. She's 7 1/2 months old.

She says, "Mama," "Dada," and "Hey."

She crawls and I can't seem to keep up.

Six teeth and lots of drool.

She wants to pull up next, and I don't know if I'm ready.

Help.

Dear “Elizabeth Taylor,”

Your first doctor’s visit was when you were just a week old. I remember I hadn’t slept for longer than an hour, maybe hour and a half, since the day before you were born. You were nursing so much and so often that my sleep had suffered immensely. After the nurse weighed you and took your temperature, she turned to me and said, “You can put another diaper on her now.” I looked at Taylor in shock and whispered, “I didn’t bring a diaper bag.” I had my purse but not a diaper bag. He and the nurse both said, “You didn’t bring a diaper bag?” I flushed and couldn’t believe my idiocy. Judge covered for me and let her know I hadn’t slept in a week nor even left the house since she’d been born. The lady found me a diaper and I shuffled to the exam room with our new little you.

Once I told that story to my family, they all laughed at me and said I should put that bit of history in your baby book. “She forgot a diaper bag,” they all chuckled. Then it was funny, but at the time I felt like a failure as a mother. Who leaves the baby’s provisions at home? Was this a sign of how terribly I was going to do as a Mom?

Since then, things have changed 100%, for sure. I now have a diaper bag, and a second bag of “back-up” items for an emergency. Plenty of clothes changes, medicine, diapers, creams, wipes, blankets, toys, etc. Always a camera. You also have changed. The visit doctor visit we are scheduled for today is your sixth month visit. You are half a year old! You roll over, sit up, laugh, you have two teeth and are working on another one, you babble, you’ve said “Mama” a handful of times, you pull up when I give you my hands, and your soul, your beautiful personality, has definitely come out.

I appreciate my mother so much more now. I always loved and adored her for how I was raised but now, I can see all the hard work she put into making my brother’s and my childhood pleasant. And my father - all the hours at the job and the sacrifices he made just because he had little ones at home. I see them now and I hug their neck in thanks. There are no words for the love that goes into raising a family and keeping it close. I am forever in debt to them for the life they gave me.

And now I look at you. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you, and there isn’t even a question about it. I do it not without a want for anything in return. You are this beautifully souled creature that I wished into existence and now we take pleasure in simply being with you. When I wake and you have made it into bed with your father and I because you woke at 4 a.m. and I was too lazy to get out of bed to nurse and I just brought you into ours, I smile. I see you cuddled between us in the wee hours of the morning and I believe honestly I can die happy at just seeing you. Nothing in my life prepared me for this, for the joy a little human can bring.

I just want to do right by you. I want to do a good job. I see your genuinely bright eyes and your two-teethed smile and I am done for. You are the poetry in my life and the inspiration for creating good art. You have changed everything.

I love you. Happy sixth month birthday.

Always,

Cabbage. 

Let's Try This Again

Now that we're on solids, round 2, I began little Lil on the following foods:

Happy Bellies Oatmeal Cereal

and an organic avacado

The verdict is: she is in love with both. Thinks eating is fun, even. She smacks her lips and cries when I don't feed her fast enough. This did not happen before and it makes me feel awful that her first eating experience was something that made her hurt. But we're cooking with gas now - and off to a whole new experience. Next stop: pears.

The Heat Is On

The heat has me a bit down. I want to be able to take E and Lil out to a park or to do something active outside, but there's no way in this 100 degree heat. It would be irresponsible. The house is making me a bit mad, I have to admit.

Things are a bit tough at the Joinerhouse. I've been pondering re-entering the workforce (beside the freelance writing) because we need to be able to pay bills. I want to do something part time and I've considered Whole Foods. Anyone out there have any input on the grocery as a company? I know I like shopping there but there's no telling how a big company treats their employees. I know it's probably a better option than most places.

The thought of leaving Lil for even a moment, for the possibility of missing some of her first events or even a small smile slays me. I know most mothers don't get to spend as much time with their little one as I have and I've been at home for almost six months now, but I don't want it to end. It breaks my heart. Yet I know there's no money tree planted outside, no steady freelance gig to keep us going. Judge does all he can and I've got to pick up the slack.

I guess I suppose a part time job won't kill me. It just makes me sad. I've wanted to provide her with the luxury of a mom at home during the early years like mine did for me. I truly had a great childhood, all thanks to her and my father. 

Sorry to be a bummer. Methinks I need some Vitamin D.

Dear Earth's Best,

You are the go-to organic brand in most stores. Since my little girl is starting solids and I wasn't prepared to make my own yet (I wanted to get a few supplies first) I picked up a few jars of food and your brown rice cereal. There is nothing mentioned about having dairy or soy within these products, but soon she started breaking out. And crying. She's been irritable for five days now.

After doing a little research on the internet, I found that you use soy lectin to bind your vitamin compounds to the cereal and veggies and fruit. I believe that she has a dairy ans soy allergy, which a lot of kids do, and your products have made her first eating experience tough. Why? Because it isn't labeled on the packages.

There is no mention of dairy or soy on the label. Thank goodness for Happy Bellies, which clearly states, NO DAIRY. NO SOY. on the label.

You are fired. That is all.

Sincerely,

Cabbage

Walkabout

Lil has outgrown her ring sling (or at least I can't handle the weight it puts on my shoulder) and I have been checking into other carriers. I have settled on this one, I think - after several recommendations.

I found one at Amazon. It's on the list!

My Loves

Breaking the Fall

We are about to have a very mobile kid on our hands. Every day she gets a little closer to sitting up and crawling across the floor. The only problem is that our floors at home are concrete. Since she will be running around on the floor herself and trying to learn to walk, we decided to look into some interlocking mats for our house to cushion the fall. Here are our options.

SoftTiles - They have special double mats that are 2x2x1

Walmart has playmats and they're fairly cheap.

GetRung

SoftNSafe Floors seem to be priced really, really well.

GreatMats have free shipping

Dear "Elizabeth Taylor,"

It’s funny Taylor wanted to call you “Elizabeth Taylor.” It was for a your great-grandmother, but you truly are a dark-haired, thickly-eyelashed little babe who resembles her. You just have blue eyes where hers were almost violet.

You are five months old today and have just acquired two new teeth. I can’t believe how time has flown and now you’re almost sitting up. Every day you amaze me with new feats of strength or personality. I wake each morning and find myself marveling at how I love you even more and how you continue to become your own person. You are our little Lil and are precious beyond words.

I am so thankful for being home during this time in your life. Your father is to thank for that. We may not have a lot of money, but he works and works and works to pay our bills so I can be the one who stays with you. I never thought I would be so fulfilled with the role of mother and yes, of housewife. (Housewife? My twenty-something self is scoffing at me in a parallel universe.) Being here for all the babbling, the teeth cutting, the singing, the trying to sit up, crawl, and the million smiles, it is really, really important to me, and I don’t lack for inspiration in my life. You really are it.

You teach me every day. You are helping me grow as a person and I thank you for that. I may be your mother, but you are the most important role I have ever undertaken. The most challenging and the most rewarding.

Thank you for choosing us. I knew you before you arrived and I can’t wait to get to know you more. And don’t worry about those mean old teeth. This too shall pass.

I love you.

Always,

Cabbage

Ah, classic...

Here's my rock and roll/Jersey Shore baby. We combed her hair straight up just to see if it'd stay. It did. This is one of those pictures that when she sees it when she's a teenager, she'll say, "Oh Mom! Why did you do that to me?" And I will laugh.

Juicy Lil

She's all business when she's on her stomach. I love the drool on her chin.

Her favorite pastime these days is blowing bubbles. Note more drool on the chin and a slight smile because it's just so fun. 

Grandparents

Here's little Lil with my parents.

Look at that baby's cheeks!

Asleep on the porch, enjoying the breeze